Chill Out

What a day! 

I’ve been going to the doctors every day to get my wound dressed. Today she had a look and then went “Erm.” 
Im lying there jeans undone, stomach wound on show, I do not want to hear any of the following “oh/erm/any slight intake of breath/any slight exhale of breathe.” 
Its not very comforting. 
“Let me just go get a dr” 
Er hello? 
Great. 
I lie there waiting and a doctor comes in and checks me out and to cut a tedious story short goes
“I think you should be seen by the surgical team.” 
Fabulous. 
More issues. 
Can’t wait. 

Off I trot with The Mother making jokes about how I’m going to need a bucket and my intestines going to fall out. As I was feeling pretty poor from not really having eaten anything I was holding onto my mum for support. I wont be doing it again. She’s terrible. If I was ever blind, God forbid, she’d end up leaving me somewhere, or have me talking to random people… anyway…

So I go through the whole song and dance of a&e. The Mother once more making inappropriate jokes next to a radiator. 
Finally get through no problems, seen by some surgeon guy who had a massive fiddle with a cotton bud thing. Poke any more and I swear you’ll see the rest of my intestine. I guess its a good thing he’s a surgeon, least he can stitch me back up. 

Luckily they said I was allowed to go home, warning me that the wound will get larger before it gets smaller because the skin above it isn’t healthy. 
I had to wait for a nurse to re dress my wound which took forever. The Mother asked if I wanted to see it but as I couldn’t really move she took a picture for me and immediately started laughing claiming it looked like a Vagina?? I obviously wanted to see and was very confused. I am unsure as to what vagina’s my mother has seen but my open wound does not look like a vagina….
If anything it looks like a dodgy bum hole… 
Mother and I were giggling like school kids when the nurse came in… again he started to fiddle and I started laughing because all I could think was “heehee you’re fiddling with a bumhole” 
Damn you mother. 

It was an eventful day with what might be something amazingly lucky to come out of it. In my previous post I said that my surgery had been delayed because I don’t have a clinic meeting till mid April. 
Well, as my wounds a bit dodge they have said they will book me in for a clinic meeting in 4 weeks. This means its after my pouchagram which then means that when seeing my surgeon he’ll have the results of it. Who knows, if Im really lucky he might push it forward instead of seeing me in April and then deciding when to have the surgery. 
All depends, but the dodgey wound might have worked out in my favour. 

You never know what’s going to happen which just proves that life is seriously just telling me to chill the hell out and just take life as it comes 🙂

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