Itch

Its about half ten on a Sunday morning.
Some people are sleeping, some are running, some are just waking up making plans for the day.
I was sitting in a shallow bath crying because my arse was so itchy.
Well part crying then laughing because it was so hilarious.
Imagine the worst itch, like a scab that’s healing and then multiply it by a hundred. Even then I’m not sure you can hit the magnitude of how itchy my damn arse is.
I never thought I’d cry over something like this but people… its.. I can’t even describe to you how insanely frustrating it is.
I thought I could scratch it.
Oh dear.
I felt immense relief then the itch came back worse.
I put cream on it
I use baby wipes.
People I have sat on ICE to try and sort out this itch but nothings helping.
I’m mid conversation and then I can feel the itch, damn it I’m outside, in public, trying so hard not to get something like a brush and stick it up my backside to cure this thing.
I’m getting a little worried I’m going to end up like this

Just going to get on down and start dragging myself along the carpet.
Seriously guys anything to cure this itch because it’s driving me nuts!!!!

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