The Method To The Madness

Over the past week I have been asked this question several times
“Why are you running a half marathon if you hate to run”

My response has been “I have no idea”

I took the time out to sit and actually think why am I doing something I really hate? Why could I not have raised money doing something I enjoyed?

I have always been a very active person. In school I would play netball, football, tennis, looked forward to sports days and what with being a hyperactive person, I was always on the move. University came and though I was never on any teams, I was studying acting and so was on a very physical course.

I love to be active.
Colitis slowly stopped me from being as active as I liked. I couldn’t exercise for long periods of time because I was tired constantly. When things were really bad I couldn’t even go for walks for fear of having some sort of accident. (Yes people, I do mean of the pant soiling kind)

When I had my operation, it took me three months to recover and be able to do a few shifts at work, let alone start any exercise.

The moment where I decided to run was after my second operation. It was partly inspiration from a friend of mine, Candice. I had seen her journey unfold, which by the way you should all check out here
and read the amazing journey about a girl who is running the world for Avert(ing) HIVand AIDS

And partly because I had been so sick of not being able to move. I wanted to make my body stronger. It had been through much and still had another operation to go. I wanted to take care of it.
I had no money to spare to go swimming or buy any work out dvds so I started to run.
I hated it (as you are all aware from my previous post) but I would get better with every run that I did and I slowly got addicted to the feeling of adrenalin kicking in when I realised I’d beat my PB. Addicted to the might rush of those feel good hormones rushing around my brain, making me love life and anyone I came across! Addicted to the fact that after a good, hard, long run, I would sleep like a baby.

I chose to run for my charity because doing a sky dive or bungy jump is something I really want to do. Its not a challenge for me and therefore not an achievement.
I won’t grow as a person from doing a sky dive, I mean sure I’ll have an awesome memory of it but I intend to do it when I go travelling.
Running is an epic challenge for me, it teaches me things I didn’t know about myself and it will continue to teach me because this mind of mine is going to have to be shown who’s boss at some point.

When I run this race in September I won’t be the same person who is writing this blog. I have a lot of learning to do, a lot of hard graft to get through and some revelations to share.
With this run I know that I will have put my everything into this. Raising awareness for Crohns and Colitis is something that means a lot to me. I want to reach as many people as possible with this fundraising so that those suffering know that they are not alone. Most importantly they don’t have to go through this disease alone.

Sure, I’m a little bit crazy for deciding to do something I hate, where I will spend hours every week clocking up miles, where I will have to most probably cancel dinner dates and catch up sessions in favour of training. But this run will just highlight the fact that I can do anything I set my mind to regardless of what I have been though. I hope that people with IBD can take something away from my journey and feel just a little bit better about their own. I can’t inspire people by just doing a sky dive.
I have to earn the right to be inspirational.

Motivational Speech

My first post about how my running is going!

This morning the run KICKED MY ASS.
Like, I mean, took me by the scruff of my neck, gave me a wedgie and flushed my head down the toilet kind of kicked my ass.
I just could not get into it this morning. My pace was off, my concentration was all over the place and more importantly my breathing was in ruins!

I glanced over at this wondrous creature beside me who was pulling off a 5k with ease, with a slight film of sweat on her brow.
Flick back to me and I was drinking in the air like it was the list 5 minutes of the happy hour at a cocktail bar. My face was so red I’m pretty sure I looked like I was about to explode and I was sweating so much my earphones kept popping out my ears.
Yup. I am one attractive lady when I run.

I wanted to stop so many times during that run but I kept telling myself to just put one foot in front of the other, that’s all you have to keep doing.

My Just giving dontation page is up and running and I am already overwhelmed by the support I have received. I’d like to take the time out briefly to mention a couple of people here not because their donation means more, but in theory I am running for these guys too
Becky, Rob, Gemma and Rio
These guys have had colitis and furthermore have all had stomas or still have stomas. These guys have been people who really and truly get what I mean when I say I am having a seriously shit day. They have supported me and listened to me when I’ve needed to vent about stuff and given me advice/hope when things have got bad.
When I am slogging my guts out at the gym and I think I can’t do it any more these are the faces that pop up and I think I just have to keep on going.

When I run, I’m not just running for me. I’m running for every single person out there who has Crohns and Colitis. For every person who has felt ashamed, felt pain and anguish, felt like they couldn’t continue and that the disease would beat them.

I’m running this 10k to raise awareness for the strong people out there who have to suffer with this disease in silence.

This isn’t just about making money for charity its for getting this all out in the open. The more people I reach with this the better, so when you read my blogs, I would seriously appreciate it if all of you could pass on this website to everyone you know. Hell they don’t need to donate, don’t get me wrong it would be nice, give me 10p if that’s all you have, but just get people talking about IBD share my story, get the word out there.

And now that I’ve gone all Barrack Obama on yo asses (I just mean in the sense of motivational speaking before I get some kind of abuse) I am going to have a nice long soak to ease my tired muscles.